Le message de Nick :

Well, well, well. Fresh off the plane with my wife
from our second honeymoon on the beautiful secluded islands of the
Maldives and what do I find in my email box? A mediocre (at best)
Eminem record that sounds like it was written in 2001. At first I
thought it was old material that had been dug up from when dude
“fantasized” about having a pretend fling with Mariah. I was thinking
to myself, “Hey that was before me so it is really none of my business,
so I’m going to give him a pass.”
So as I continued to semi enjoy Marshall’s rhyme
scheme and flow, I mean let’s be honest dude used to be incredible. He
was a witty lyrist with dope delivery and timing. Some even say, one of
the best to ever do it. I had nothing but respect for this dude. But
all of a sudden I hear my name in the verse! My first reaction was
like, “This is his new shit??? Wow, that’s too bad…” Then I felt sorry
for him because he must really be stuck in the past. Not only has his
music not evolved, but also homeboy is still obsessed with my wife, the
same female that wouldn’t let him get to second base from 8 years ago!
He even describes his desperate lameness in this bad excuse for
storytelling track. That’s some real middle school shit right there!
(What type of grown ass man lies about getting with a chick) Only Slim
Lamey! LOL!
So as I further examine the track, I hear dude
cross the line. He begins to call my wife out of her name! Now as y’all
know, I don’t take that type of nonsense lightly. So on some grown man
shit I’m instantly like, I got to get at this Lame. I know it’s only
entertainment and I’m all for freedom of speech. But I’m from the
school of thought where if you are tough enough to talk shit, you got
to be tough enough to deal with the consequences that come with tough
guy shit talking! Then the little angel on my shoulder said, “No
Nicholas, there is no need to play into his negativity. He is just a
troubled soul yearning for the lost spotlight. You must be Christ like
and turn the other cheek”
But then the dude on the other shoulder said, “
What Nigga?! Is you scared?! You can’t let no man ever disrespect your
wife! Especially not some Peroxide drenched homophobic has-been! This
is like some Paquiao vs. Hatton shit! He is underestimating you with
his ass out and you can drop him in the first round!”
Then, without listening to either one of the
voices on my shoulders, I analyzed the situation from a logical
perspective. Am I going to battle Eminem and try to out rap him? No,
that would be stupid. The dude is nice on the mic. Even though nowadays
he lacks substance, rapping about when he used to be hot. Like when Al
Bundy gloats about his High school football prime.
Then I asked myself should I go find this Bitch
and just whoop his little ass? But that might have just been the
Creatine and protein shakes talking! LOL. Even though most people don’t
know that I’m nice in the ring and have been training in boxing and
Martial Arts for years that would just be childish and silly of me to
bully this dude. He clearly has been picked on all his life and I would
hate to add to his deep-rooted pain. As we all know he has had a hard
life and has major insecurity issues and is very confused and unhappy
with himself. So a guy like that doesn’t really need another ass
whoopin, he needs a hug. We should really pray for his troubled heart.
So just when the good guy in me is about to emerge
and shine through, something hits me… Something bigger than rap beefs,
something bigger than jealousy infused insults, something bigger than
lackluster attention seeking punchlines, something bigger than artistic
expression. I realized, that this so-called man has just disrespected
and slanderized one of the world’s most significantly influential
artists, one of the most notable
BLACK females of our time, the incredibly cherished, globally loved and world-embraced woman of color, Mariah Carey!
Some people may not realize or tend to forget that
my wife is a Black woman. And she has had enough difficulty in her life
dealing with racial and ethnicity issues. Believe it or not, Mariah is
the same racial mixture as our beloved president Barack Obama. [Black
Father + White Mother=
BLACK]
Maybe I’m going too far, but I thought we got
passed the days where white men could spew vulgar obscenities at our
beautiful queens and get away with it. What’s next? Are we going to let
this trash say something horrible about our lovely first lady, Mrs.
Michelle Obama? Or would Marshall have talked sideways out of his neck
like this about Oprah Winfrey? This act of racist bigotry cannot go
unnoticed. Calling my wife a “cunt” and a “whore” is way worse than
anything Don Imus could have ever said. So trust, repercussions will be
served. Anybody got Al Sharpton’s number?! LOL
Let’s not forget about Eminem’s amateur mixtape
rants of calling African Americans Nigger and how he hates “Black
Bitches”. How did we let him get away with that in the first place?! He
is a natural born racist in disguise. Someone tell this coward that he
finally barked up the wrong tree. For his entire career he
strategically only tried to beef with people he could bully. I mean,
what real man picks fights with women? Real MC’s battle other real
MC’s. Ask Nas, ask Jay Z, you didn’t see them starting beefs with
women! That is truly some punk shit!
So I’m putting this out there now. Marshall
Mathers, you need to holler at me on some grown man shit. Man to man,
let’s meet up and deal with this like adults. This is my invitation to
you, whenever and wherever you like sir. So when you come out of your
introverted hiding place and ask your bodyguards if you can go out and
play by yourself, I’m here Pimp!
Your blatant disrespect not just to Black women
but ALL women in general must stop. You are a despicable excuse for a
man. I can’t even see how you can call yourself a father! Imagine if
someone said half the stuff you say about women to your daughter,
Hayley. (And I’m pretty sure they will because you got it coming
Marshall.) That’s how Karma works.
You sold your little records and made a little bit
of change but now you are stepping in the wrong territory. You may have
been able to rape and pillage our artform like an old school Caucasian
con man and nobody said anything because we respected your talent, but
now you’ve made the ultimate mistake. Don’t you know that the black
woman is the foundation and the strongest force in our culture? Take
notes homey, Elvis would have never disrespected Aretha Franklin or
Diana Ross. You were supposed to just do your little song and dance,
make your little racist money and call it a day. But no, you had to
dishonor the black man’s most precious counterpart.
I’m taking full action on you Eminem. I don’t know
why no one has stood up to your bitch ass yet. But I guess it’s going
to take a corny, wack rapping, boy toy from Nickelodeon to set you
straight. And trust, I am going to be relentless. Even though I got a
lot of other obligations and occupations, you are my new full time job
“homey”! As a matter of fact I think you going to bring my wack rhymes
out of retirement! That’s right haters; you can thank Eminem because
I’m going to start rapping again! LOL Just for him! And don’t forget
about the jokes! We coming at you hard body!! Non-stop on your
Manic-depressive-Insecure-Maclovin-Nazi- Liza Minelli haircut
havin-lookin ass!! [Pause] That’s what I do all day Bitch!
So Miss Marshall, I’m going to make you wish you
never spoke my name and regret the ungodly things you said about my
wife. This is going to be fun! It’s however you want it! Just remember,
you did this to yourself! Your legacy has now been tainted from this
day forth! You will now be known as the rapper who lost to Corny-ass
Nick Cannon!!!